This article first appeared in
Gomantak Times, Feb 6 2005
Love and Marriage, Love and Marriage,
Goes together like a horse and carriage
Let me tell you, brother –
You can't have one without the other! - Frank Sinatra
Frank Sinatra had never heard of Sawantwadi, a historical town in
Western state of Maharashtra in India, 70 kilometers from Panaji,
capital of Goa. Perhaps not many in Sawantwadi would have heard or
heard of Frank Sinatra. But if Sinatra and Sawantwadi had ever met,
the singer would have been appointed patron saint of Sawantwadi.
In the bylanes of this town, wedlock is a weekend exercise. Like a
walk in the park, a trip to the store. A peck on the cheek, presumably
love too. But only till the marriage lasts.
But this town, once the seat of the Bhonsle kings, could be an ideal
location for a movie called 'Marriage Actually", a sequel to "Love
Actually". This is where hundreds of Goan couples come for a quickie
marriage to "legalise" and sanctify their love relationships. This
shaddi in a jiffy, in a mangal karyalay costs just 4000 bucks. The
package could go up if documents need to be managed. And in a matter
of an hour, a couple can be man and wife.
Sawantwadi therefore is an ideal destination to say "I do", when
parents and family members tell you "you don't".
But the ease of these marriages has other side effects. When the
'husband' wants to move on and see other women, the wife has little
recourse because these marriages stop short of being fully legal. And
then the women have no way of proving that they were actually married.
There are numerous such cases.
Picture this
• *Reena was 20 when she fell in love with a boy from her office and
married him in 1998 at Sawantwadi. However, not even a year had passed
and her husband got involved with another woman. Now she is having a
hard time trying to prove that she was "married".
• *Anamika got married on December 3, 1996 at Sawantwadi to her
childhood sweetheart Amit* in the presence of a few relatives, as
Amit's mother was against the marriage. They have two kids. But in
2000 she filed a case at Goa State Commission for Women (GSCW)
alleging that Amit was threatening to kill her as he had an affair
with another woman. Amit married the "other" woman at a temple and
they stay together. At first Anamika tried to fight for her rights,
but then she faced several hurdles and left the case mid-way and
compromised with her situation.
Sawantwadi in Maharashtra is paradise for many who want to avoid going
to the office of Civil Registration in Goa and declare their desire to
get married before the officer of the Taluka, along with a certificate
of domicile of at least one party and certificate of birth of both boy
and girl. "According to the Civil Code, before the date of
registration of marriage, the Civil Registrar shall affix a Public
notice, inviting any objections, if any, within 10 days. And the
youngsters fear that parents may come to know about the marriage and
object," said Panaji based lawyer Sudha Lad.
In Goa, the Codigo Civil Portugues or the Portuguese Civil Code (PCC),
operational from 1870 with subsequent modifications, is based on
Napoleon's French Civil Code. Even after liberation, the laws
prevailing earlier remained in Goa, now part of Indian democracy,
owing to an assurance by the Jawaharlal Nehru government. An integral
part of the PCC is the code of civil registration which makes the
registration of birth, death and marriage compulsory. However, the
procedure of registration of marriages is not entirely uniform.
Catholics have an option of solemnizing their marriages in Church
after obtaining a No Objection Certificate (NOC) from the Civil
Registrar.
While for Hindus there is no connection between the civil marriage and
religious marriage, whereas in the case of Muslims the Maulavi may ask
to see the certificate of civil registration before performing the
nikah. Muslim men whose marriages are registered in Goa cannot divorce
by pronouncing talaq thrice, nor can they have more than one wife.
In Sawantwadi city, there are 10 mangal karyalays and out of these
three are really popular with the Goans: Ashirwad Mangal Karyalay,
Shree Mangal Karyalay and Mahalaxmi Mangal Karyalay.
The owner of Shree Mangal Karyalay, Prakash Shankar Thakur Ghodoskar,
said that one just needs to inform them four days in advance to make
arrangements for the marriage. The marriage would cost only Rs 4,000.
And if one is non-Hindu then an affidavit saying that they have
accepted Hinduism would be prepared for Rs 1000 extra. The couple also
needs to bring their birth and domicile certificate. And it doesn't
matter if both of them are not from Sindhudurg area? "Domicile and
witnesses are not a problem. We will take care of it. Just bring along
the certificates and also three witnesses, from anywhere," said
Ghodoskar.
In a priestly manner he assured, "Don't worry no one can stop the
marriage. Soon after the marriage we will give you a receipt and even
if anyone registers a complaint with the police, they can't trouble
the couple. Moreover, the marriage certificate will be given within a
week or at the most within a fortnight."
Further, as a passing remark he added, "Many young Goans come here to
get married according to the Hindu rites - Saptapadi. And according to
Hindu Marriage Act 1955 and Special Marriage Act 1954 this marriage is
valid".
But is this marriage legal and accepted in Goa? The priest says "yes"
but the lawyers seem to differ. According to them, the marriage rules
laid down by the Maharashtra government are quite strict and the
couple must hail from Sindhudurg and show proof of residence (either
ration card or election card or any other certificate to show that
they are from the place). And they should get marriage certificate
from the Marriage Registration Office appointed by the government of
Maharashtra.
"As the office of the Marriage Registration Office doesn't entertain
the young couples from Goa, they go to the mangal karyalays. The
marriage takes place at Sawantwadi city and is registered in the gram
panchayats nearby. According to the Hindu Marriage Registration Act, a
marriage that is held in a city should compulsorily be registered in
the same," said advocate Bapu Gaonkar, Sawantwadi. However, these
marriages are registered with the signature of the couple, priest and
witnesses in the Gram Panchayat office of one of these villages –
Malgaon, Majgaon, Charathe, Otwane or Akeri, which are at least 4 km
from Sawantwadi city.
According to Gaonkar, though this marriage performed under Hindu rites
is valid before law under Hindu Marriage Act 1955, it is really
difficult to prove it as the witnesses of the marriage wouldn't like to accept that they were a party to any wrongdoing.
"The problem in India is that for most of us 'love means marriage and
lover has to be a husband'. And we believe that until we don't take
the seven steps (Saptapadi) there is no sanctity to the relation. And
for us the rituals are more important than the legal formalities
involved with marriage," said Madhuri Rao, counselor at Family
Counseling Centre, Panaji.
But is this marriage accepted in Goa? In the Civil Code there is a
clause, which says that if a Goan gets married outside the state then
it is advisable that the marriage is formally registered by producing
the marriage certificate from the place they got married. "There is a
conflict of laws here. The application of Goan law operates on the
basis of nationality and domicile in the territory of Goa, whereas the
law in the rest of the country operates on the basis of religion to
which you belong or on the option for the secular laws. Hence there
are two different basis in the law and there is a conflict when
considering whether the marriage performed outside the state of Goa is
to be considered valid or not," said lawyer Albertina Almeida.
But one thing is constant. Sawantwadi gets you 'married' when the
folks are in opposition and it allows you to get away when the heat of
the in laws gets to you. In an effort to make some quick bucks out of
marriage, the system of marriage ties you up in knots
